In my last post, I talked about being fully focused at home and what that looks like today with technology.  Please visit this post–I believe this issue is of utmost importance for our kids right now.

Today, I want to speak to moms more about being fully focused at home.  What does that mean exactly?  AND, how can we focus in on who we need to be for them in every stage of life?  Here are a few of my thoughts on the different stages of motherhood…

Birth to 5 years– we carry our children.
5 years to 12 years– we hold their hands.
12 years to 18 years– we walk beside them and occasionally in front of them.
18 years to adulthood– we walk behind them.

If I could go back and give myself some words of wisdom for each stage of motherhood, here’s what I’d say to myself:

Birth to 5 years– we have the chance to carry them.

“I did not give you the gift of life; life gave me the gift of you.”

When you are in this stage–nothing will be perfect. Your home, your husband, your children, will not be perfect. And neither will you. Don’t wait on perfection.

Find the joy in today.

Remember, you are EXACTLY the mom the Lord intended your babies to have.

Believe me, no one cares what schedule your baby is on, if she takes a bottle or a pacifier to nap. Really, no one cares. Do it your way.

Jump in the puddles. Why not? Let them play. Let them run up the hill and roll down. When you drive by the park, stop. Get out. Play. Get snow cones. Let them curl up in bed with you.

5 years to 12 years– we hold their hands.

“They don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.” Jim Henson

Don’t yell. You will not like the culture this creates in your home.

Read the bible with them and make it interesting. There’s good stuff in there!

Be honest–even when it’s difficult. You will want your kids to return the favor.

Take the time to teach them to do tasks, even if it would take you less time and frustration to do it yourself.

When they talk–be sure to listen. Otherwise, they will stop talking.

12 years to 18 years– we walk beside them or in front of them.

Definition of a teenager: “Someone who is ready for the zombie apocalypse, but not the math test tomorrow.”

Don’t take everything so seriously. It’s okay to laugh.

Say “yes” when you can. Your “no” will mean more. Create fun alternatives when you have to say no. Will it hurt anyone to stay up all night and play ping-pong in the garage? If not, say “yes”.

Don’t be afraid to see what you see. Don’t parent scared. When God reveals something to you, see it for what it is and deal with it.

Punish when necessary, but reward more.

Communicate! Build a good relationship NOW.  It will transfer into adulthood.

18 years through adulthood–we walk behind them.

Stay out of it. 🙂

Encourage and love.

Give advice, only when asked.

Pray.

Enjoy time together.

Take a minute and enjoy the moments God gives you with your kids today no matter what stage they are in.  We all know the time is fleeting, so be fully focused today.

My love,